traveling thoughts.

Buongiorno!

Those of you that know me probably know that I came back to Florence this week for spring break.  I was so excited to come back, but also slightly worried that it wouldn't live up to my expectations.  Boy, was I wrong.  It has been incredible.  But don't worry, this post isn't going to tell you all about my trip and serve simply to make you jealous.  I know I tend to see other's posts on social media and think, "Shoot, their life is so exciting.  Why isn't my life that exciting.  I suck."  I suck sometimes too, it's okay.  Just not this week.  This week I'm one of the cool ones.  But I digress.

I studied abroad in Florence in the fall of 2012, so about a year and a half ago. It was full of beautiful sights and new experiences, but my favorite part was the people.  There are such interesting people half way around the world, and they may speak a different language, but they are talking about the same things that you would be talking about in English.  Luckily, most of the people in Florence speak a fair amount of English as well, so it is pretty easy to converse.  I made it a priority to connect with people as often as possible, and as a result made a few decent friends, some of which I even keep up with on Facebook now and then.

Late Sunday night, after about 20 hours of travelling and about 3 hours of sleep, I met up with one of my Italian friends because he would be gone for the rest of the week.  I was nervous that it would be awkward or I wouldn't be able to speak good enough Italian, but as soon as he saw me he gave me a huge hug, and we had a great time with one of his friends and one of mine, speaking in Itanglish.  When you put forth an effort to speak someone else's language and probably sound stupid, you definitely humble yourself.  Both me and my friend were profoundly humbled with our attempts at the other's language, but we both appreciated the effort, and it gave the conversation a genuine feel as neither of us felt the need to prove how cool we were.

As I have been going around Florence the past few days, I ran into 3 or 4 more people who I had known when I was here.  I tend to remember most people I interact with, but I tend to assume that most people don't remember me.  It has been so cool to have this assumption proven wrong, as I see the recognition on people's faces when they see me again after a year and a half.  As I reminded one of them of my name, he goes, "Of course I remember your name!  Why wouldn't I?  We had good conversation."  That is when it me - genuine conversation is what people enjoy, because it is so rare.  Having a real conversation with someone connects you.  Bear with me while I try and make a somewhat poetic simile (I'm a biochemistry major, the closest we get to poetry is the abstract of a lab report).  Our lives are like lines, and every once in a while when you genuinely connect with another person, your line intersects with theirs.  All of those intersections are so much more beautiful than a single line.  And you never know when a simple intersection will turn into something more - a person you can visit abroad, a lifelong friend, a relationship.  But even if they never do, and it is only a single connection that lasts for 10 minutes, an hour, a plane ride - why not make them?  Your life will be full of beautiful memories.

Ok, and here are some obligatory pictures to make you jealous/depressed.  I'm sorry.

**Side note - same logic applies to food.  The more good food you can eat, the better.  I love food.  In case that wasn't ever made clear.

-S

10 songs to listen to at 2 in the morning

So I generally avoid getting into bed with my laptop because I know I'll be up til the buttcrack of dawn on Reddit looking at gifs of adorable dogs and learning absolutely "essential" life pro tips that everyone "needs" to know. Alas, here I am. On my laptop at 2 in the morning browsing the endless wealth of information that is the internet.

As I was browsing, a song on Spotify shuffled its way into my ears that caused me to stop browsing and just sit back and close my eyes. Super deep stuff, I know. Do you have that one song that makes you think? I completely forget how powerful music is sometimes. It can transport you back to that perfect summer night on the beach at one in the morning or to that one time you laughed so hard you physically could not laugh anymore because it hurt so much or to that heartbreaking last goodbye with the person you loved the most. Here are some of my favorite songs to listen to when it's late and you just need to sit back and reflect on your existence. (Listen with headphones, preferably.)

10. Outro - M83

This song is just pure magic. God made M83 on the 8th day, I'm convinced. 

9. Divenire - Ludovico Einaudi

Achingly beautiful piece. Makes me wish I never quit piano. Now I'm sad.

8. Come to Me - Bethel Music

The original version with Jenn Johnson's vocals is absolutely beautiful, but there's something so intimate and redemptive about this one. 

7. Oceans - For a Season

I'll be the first person to tell you that I'm not a Christian music fanatic but this song is oh so powerful that I had to share it. I was going through an extremely hard time when someone sent me this and it was exactly what I needed. 

6. Into the West - Annie Lennox

Ok, so now I'm just trying to make you cry. But really though, can I get an AMEN on this being the saddest movie scene of all time?!? I remember practically bawling in the movie theater and staring at the black screen realizing that life as I knew it would never be the same. This is my way of seguing into one of the greatest songs of all time that I may or may not know all the words to thanks to my nerdy obsession with LOTR: 

5. Only Time - Enya

How could I not include Enya on this list? I vividly remember watching a special on 9/11 with this song playing in the background and have forever associated the two together. There's no denying the underlying sadness and sense of longing in the song, but there's a hopefulness that holds it together and perfectly captures the spirit of life. 

4. Somewhere Over the Rainbow - Eva Cassidy

My mom and I used to listen to Eva Cassidy's album over and over again on car rides to school or gymnastics and belt out each song in our very below average voices. I think this is the most beautiful rendition of 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' I've ever heard, but maybe that's just me being nostalgic. Do me a favor and listen to all her songs, specifically 'Songbird', 'Fields of Gold', and 'Autumn Leaves'. 

3. Slow Dancing in a Burning Room - John Mayer

How could I not include Johnny boy? This is one of my absolute favorite songs by him. Regardless of his reputation, his music is undeniably good. 

2. A Remark You Made - Weather Report

I bet none of you knew that I have a secret love affair with jazz music. I bet none of you care, either. OH WELL. This is me and my dad's song (what is the correct grammar use there? Not even going to try). Nostalgia is getting to me again, but you definitely have to listen to it. I could listen to it all day. 

1. Oblivion (feat. Susanne Sundfor) - M83

As you'll notice, M83 is one of my favorite bands. It feels strange to call them a band... they're more like an intensely magical group of musicians to me. That's what I'll start calling them from now on. There's something so rare and otherworldly about their music that draws people in and they deserve every bit of success they've had. This song is just incredible. If you only have time to listen to one of the songs on this list, make it this one. You won't regret it.

Now it's way past my bedtime and I need to stop pondering the meaning of life and hit the sack. Buenos noches!

-H

ah 2014, here you are

Happy New Year to everyone! 2014. Wow. Happy 14th birthday world!



I'm kidding, Mr. Llama. I promise.

Anyways, I've been trying to come up with some resolutions to make myself better but it's difficult. There are so many things I want to do and so many places I want to go! So, I downloaded an accountability app called 'Everest' and got to work.

Here are my tangible goals this year:
1. Read 50 books
2. Read my Bible for 20 minutes each morning
3. Do something selfless each day
4. Memorize one Bible verse each week
5. Write a journal entry once a week
6. Genuinely compliment someone once a day
7. Drink 8 glasses of water a day
8. Have $1000 in my savings account by the end of the semester
9. Get an internship in DC/ NYC
10. Complete a 5k (gotta start somewhere, AMIRIGHT?)
11. Leave the country
12. Find out a new person's passion every week
13. Laugh really hard once a day
14. Get married

And here are some of my abstract goals:
1. Live more in the PRESENT and spend a lot less time on the Internet (hard to do at college, but it must be done!)
2. Work out more
3. Eat cleaner
4. Start a prayer journal

• Side note: Jack Wellman suggested making the header of each request like this: 
• Date
• Prayer request details
• Person's name or thing I prayed for (even if it's me)
• Date answered (when it comes)

5. Cut negative people out of my life
6. Learn a new skill
7. Wake up earlier
8. Be the kindest to people who deserve it the least
9. Stop participating in mindless gossip (about frenemies, celebrities, etc.)
10. Smile when I don't feel like it

And sorry boys, #14 was thrown in there for shock value. What are your resolutions? And what can I add to my already too-long list?

-H

finals, Beyonce, and everything in between

It's just me and Beyonce sitting a room. I can only ask her one question. Should I ask her how she looks so flawless all the time? Or how she can reach that high note without sounding like a dying cow? No. Here's what I'm going to ask her: Why, OH WHY, did you release your album during finals? I'm over here trying to be the best student I can be, and at midnight last night you decide that it's a good idea to just surprise the world. So I spent about 3 hours last night listening to it/ watching the videos and it's safe to say I love it. There are a few ratchet tunes, but I'll let her get away with it because it's Bey. One of my favorite songs is called 'Pretty Hurts' and the video is even better. Please please please watch it so you can understand what I'm talking about after the jump:

I'm sure you all have read articles and heard tons of advice about loving yourself, blah blah blah. But I saw this video and was instantly shocked by something: every time I see Beyonce, she exudes confidence and strength. I'm not even saying that because I'm a fan, I'm saying that as an objective fact. Love her or hate her, you have to admit she does not come across as insecure. Throughout the 'Pretty Hurts' music video, Beyonce portrayed herself as someone who worried about what people thought and had major self-esteem issues and it blew my mind.

It was funny seeing her try to act insecure because it just looked so unnatural. And then I thought, why do I sell myself short? Sure, Beyonce might not be exactly who I want to be when I grow up because I don't agree with the way she does a lot of things, but she showed me something about myself today. As a woman, she knows the power she has and does not let any insecurities get in her way, and neither should I. This quote by Marianne Wilson has always been one of my favorites, and it fits in so well with what I'm trying to articulate: 

Just think, being a confident, FIERCE, independent woman is not just for your own benefit, but it will inspire others to break free from their own box of insecurity too. Win-win! 

Good luck on all your finals, my people. We can do this.  

creepy vs. cute.

When you like someone, it is imperative to be extremely careful in how you show it.  I have come to learn that there is a fine, fine line between something eliciting an “aww” and a smile, versus an “eww” and a look of confusion/fear.  I think there are a few reasons why this is the case.

1)      Your body language/overall “aura”.  Certain people are just inherently more creepy than others, and if this is you, be sure you are aware of this and don’t say anything that could even possibly be misconstrued as creepy.  For example, take the phrase “When I’m in a crowded room, the only person I see is you.”  Steve Buscemi (see Fig. 1) says this – girl is creeped out.  Ryan Gosling says this (see Fig. 2, even though I’m pretty sure everyone already has a great mental image) – girl is swept off her feet.  Overall lesson: if you look like Steve Buscemi, make sure you say safer things, like “You look nice today.”

Figure 1.

Figure 2.

**Figure 3. Note that even Ryan Gosling looks creepy when he has no teeth.  So if you have no teeth, be extra aware of what you say.

2)      Confidence level.  Being confident in yourself is super important.  Not appearing confident reads as desperate, and desperation will always correlate with creepiness.  An example would be this girl reading Taylor Swift lyrics – her desperate body language reads MAJORLY creepy, yet somehow when Taylor Swift sings these words, guys across America fall for her charm.

3)      Hide certain things.  At first anyway.  I have a hard time with this one, because I am all about being open and honest.  But sometimes, complete honesty is not the best policy.  Girls especially can get carried away with this.  If a guy asks “Did you enjoy our first date?”, it is probably not the best to say, “Yes!  Afterwards I came home, told my 10 cats all about it, stalked all 673 of your Facebook pictures, and created a new Pinterest wedding board!”, even if this is the case.  Same goes for guys though. We’ve all heard stories about a guy meeting a girl and going home and telling his family and friends “I met the girl I’m going to marry today!”  When she hears this story at their wedding, she tears up and everyone awws and is incredibly jealous that their lives are not that perfect.  However, had the guy gone up to the girl the first day they met and informed her of their impending nuptials, she would have probably run away, to the nearest police station, and filed a restraining order.  

4)      Mode of communication.  We have so many options when it comes to communicating with someone: text, facebook message, call, skype, morse code, carrier pigeon, etc.  But here’s the problem – when we aren’t talking face to face, somehow we feel infinitely more bold and like we have permission to say very creepy things.  Moral: don’t say something over text that you wouldn’t have the boldness to say face to face.  It doesn’t look more confident or impressive when you say something extremely forward over texting, it looks like you’re only saying it because you’re hiding behind your phone and that makes you not confident, which makes you creepy.

5)      Chemistry/timing/God smiling down on you.  This is just in reference to that special je ne sais quoi that certain relationships have (that took about 5 tries to get the right spelling, by the way).  Certain people just click, at certain times, when they are both looking for it, and while anyone else may think things they do are creepy, they both just understand each other.  There’s this quote that I’ve heard before that I really like and I think it applies: “We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love—true love.”

Let’s be real, it’s really a small miracle that anyone gets into a relationship with anyone else without screwing it up first with all of their potential for creepiness.  If you’ve experienced some major creepiness before, feel free to share in the comments (and who hasn’t, am I right?) J

-S

FINALS: how do you cope?

This past week I got to see family and friends for Thanksgiving break and enjoyed every second of it aside from the moments when my cousins decided that giving me noogies and sitting on me would be fun. I'm not trying to make this a corny post about how thankful I am for the people God gave me, (which I SO am, by the way), so I will spare you. What I will talk about, however, is how much I missed laughing. Not to say that I'm this soulless robot-person when I'm not home, but I definitely realized how anxious and worried I am at school. I didn't even realize how big of an effect it had on me. Back story: I have this disorder called TMJ

(Temporomandibular joint dysfunction) where my jaw aches and it's painful to talk or eat. Over the Thanksgiving break, I realized that I hadn't experienced the pains once and it hit me: I wasn't stressed at all! HALLELUJAH. The second I rolled back to school about an hour ago, guess what happened? MY JAW STARTED TO HURT. So what's the solution? I think it's laughter, good friends, and not over-thinking everything. Over the next two weeks, I have four 10 page papers due, a presentation, and five finals. Just thinking about it makes me want to drink bleach. Fear not, fans, I will not do that. I will make time to laugh, grab a drink with friends, and just relax. So if you're a college student and you're stressed about finals, or if you're just someone who's a stressed out person in general, here's my advice: laugh. Here are a few things that made me laugh this week. Because I know this is everything you've been waiting for in life. 

1. Warning: you may find this sacrilegious. However, God probably thought it was funny too. Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you absolutely had to be silent and you start to laugh? Well, my sister and I were sitting in the front row of this very conservative church that we haven't been to for years and we were receiving communion. It was time for me and Annie to eat the bread and when we bit into it, it tasted like some form of stale cake-bread. We looked at each other and I whispered, "What is this?" We probably would not have been laughing so hard if we were allowed to talk, but the fact that we had to be silent made it the funniest thing in the world. I kept my head down because I was crying from laughter and I kept making these weird snorty noises. I'm sure we sounded like dying animals. My mom looked over and told us to stop and that we were embarrassing her which of course made us laugh even harder. We eventually recovered and were respectful the rest of the communion, I promise. Moral of the story: everything is funnier when you have to be quiet.

2. My family and I were eating sushi in Nashville and we ordered a BUTTLOAD of food. All of the sushi rolls were really good because the raw fish wasn't excessive, except for this one roll. I saved it for last because I knew it was gonna be a struggle and I popped it in my mouth. Much to my dismay, I couldn't bring myself to bite down. I sat there with a massive ball of raw fish just hanging out in my mouth (sorry if this is too graphic, you can stop reading) when the chef looked over at me. I just smiled with my bulging cheeks and gave him the thumbs up. What else was I supposed to do??? I ended up just swallowing it whole.

3. The fact that the Browns found a way to lose in the last two minutes of the fourth quarter today. Us Clevelanders have to laugh so we don't cry. 

4. This photo of my dad I found today at my grandma's:

There are a billion more ways to combat stress. I want to know the ways that you do, because God knows I need it. Remember: laugh every day. It's great and people like being around you. 

-H

i have nothing to say.

It’s been a really long time since I’ve written anything.  And I apologize.  But I also have a reason- albeit a lame one- I feel like I have nothing to say. 

This blog started out super hot and exciting (ok, it felt that way to Halle and I, but we tend to think we’re more awesome than we probably are).  We were getting lots of compliments, people would say how funny or insightful a certain post was, and we watched the number of page views climb.  With that came the pressure – oh man, we gotta keep this up.  People have expectations now; what if I fail them?  What if I’m not funny enough?  What if this post doesn’t get as many views as the last one?

But you know what – don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.  Ok, that was super corny, and it just makes me think of “A Cinderella Story” (man, what ever happened to Chad Michael Murray…), but it’s true.  The fear of failure is never going to accomplish anything except make you more likely to fail. 

Thanks for the transition to my next point Chad.  Also, for your good looks.

Also, sometimes I might not think that I have anything that important to say.  In fact, a lot of the time I feel that way.  I get bored with myself.  I’ve been inside my head for 20 years now; I’ve kind of heard all there is to hear from me.  But we don’t have to be anything particularly exciting or awesome to capture people’s interest.  Just being your genuine self is enough to make you important.  That’s all anyone wants – someone they can be themselves with.  Someone that admits that they aren’t exciting enough or funny enough or religious enough or smart enough, because that makes you relatable.  You aren't pretending to be something you're not.

Another side note while I’m feeling deep – that’s all God wants from us too.  Our genuine selves.  You might not feel like you have anything to say to Him – tell Him that.  You might not feel interesting enough or holy enough or enough of anything to measure up to God.  That’s ok, because you aren’t.  And the fact that you realize you aren’t puts you in the perfect position to talk to God.  Be honest with Him, be yourself with Him, be sad, mad, happy, or doubtful with Him.  We don’t have to try and come up with these great things to say to impress Him; He loves us for who we are.  Let’s try and remember that.

-S